The Discerning Texan

As I toiled on my sidewalk in Dallas, Texas this afternoon, breaking up the sheet of lingering thick, slick ice with a shovel (so my mailman won't fall down and sue me), I thought of this Tim Blair's Daily Telegraph piece about "Science Screaming..." at us that I had just read (courtesy of the Instapundit).

Trust me, it is hard to do manual labor like that while resisting the urge to throw up:

Power duo Al Gore and John Kerry take their global warming show to snowbound Washington, DC:

“The Science is screaming at us,” said Kerry, who, like Gore is a former Democratic Presidential candidate. Kerry also has his own tome on the threat of global warming.

“To the naysayers and the deniers out there, let me make it clear the little snow in Washington does nothing to diminish the reality of the crisis that we face,” Kerry said.

Note that “Science” is now a proper noun. Like “Jesus”. Meanwhile … owls.

UPDATE. Dave S. emails:

A winter storm has socked about half the US the past couple of days, affecting Arkansas, Kentucky, the southern plains, Michigan, New England, etc etc., in an arc from the Deep South to the extreme North.

Al Gore was in D.C. to give an address to Congress today on the dangers of global warming. I mean, climate change. Wait, he actually said “the climate crisis”, which I guess is what you use for cold weather that (A) isn’t warm, that (B) occurs in winter, so it’s not very changey, but (C) does cause some actual crisis, if temporary power outages and icy roads are a “crisis”.

Anyhoo, if we take a string and put one end on D.C., then stretch it to Arkansas, and then move that end in a northerly arc encompassing Michigan to Maine, we can conclusively demonstrate the range of the Gore Effect as a radius of well over one thousand miles. That’s a pretty impressive swath of inconvenience.

You may recall that previous Gore Effects were fairly localized. I posit a tentative theorem that the intensity of the Gore Effect rises exponentially with his size. We’re about fifty triple cheeseburgers from worldwide apocalypse.

Warning: the actual truth will not only set you free; it will make you mad...